Monday, March 14, 2011

Girls only today...

Today was the day of days I dread each year. Have you guessed what it is yet? Oh, I think you know,,,mammography day. It's like scheduling humiliation. I heard statements like "okay, relax" and "be real still!" Smart remarks are going thru my head but I didn't dare voice them because she was IN CONTROL. I also suffer from nervous laughter, it's a curse, I can't help it. In times when I should be serious, high pressure, it's all I can do (and most times don't) not to just laugh until I cry. But really, did she expect me to relax AND did she think I was going to run out of the room when she had my boob in her vice grip?

First, you go in and they tell you to put on THE TOP. It's only a "top" in the sense that it's fabric on your top half. There are no sleeves, your uh "test subjects" are there ready to be laid on the uh alter. Next, you get to be repositioned like about 18 times so I just start looking around at the pictures and counting the ceiling tiles (anything but start laughing.) Have you noticed that the vice grip - like alter is clear? I'm sure there's a reason for that other that finding out just exactly how flat your boob can be.

Well, that's all the rambling I've got for today, this day of days. Oh my, if you've never had this procedure done, ignore the above and let me know how it goes. I think if I have some chocolate I'll feel better. Sorry, the only pictures taken today haven't been developed yet. Blessings to you all from the holler...........

8 comments:

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

LOL - great post - hope you got that chocolate:) And all good wishes for a great report.

Nurse Nancy said...

Every year I have had a mammogram and put up with a little discomfort. I had mine a month ago and it was really painful! The soreness lasted for a few days after. I may wait for 2 years before I get another one. There must be a better way!

JP said...

Sounds like about as much fun as waking up in the middle of a colonoscopy. :o)

"Nurse, could you tighten that up just a tad more? I always wanted them to look like a pair of flour tortillas."

Cindy said...

That squeezing is torture---and, not that you want to know, I'm rather small! I cannot imagine what it is like for the more bountifully endowed. All this we go thru and then we get conflicting reports as to the benefits. Your comments were funny. And as for laughing---at funerals and during church services is about as bad as it gets for the nervous laugher!!!

Deborah said...

Good Luck with your results. I go every year too.
xxoo
Deborah

Paula said...

*OUCH.*
This story makes me want to cross my arms.... but I love finding out I'm not the only one with nervous laughter. And it matters not where... I actually had to step outside a funeral home once before the giggles turned into full-blown hysteria because something struck me funny.
Yes, have some chocolate, it will make you feel much better.

Paula said...

Oh, and I just read JP's comment... I sure hope I don't think of the flour tortillas in the choir Sunday morning.
Thanks a lot, JP.

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